I also know that God has never left this child or her mother. He has walked with us through it all. You see, Courtney is not mine. She belongs to the Father. I just get to borrow her for a short season of life. My sole job is to prepare her to go home to the Father. What is amazing about this whole process is that Courtney has been preparing me to let her go, not the other way around.
I woke up this morning and after bathing my princess, we went to Mass. I prayed my heart out. I begged, I pleaded for some sense of peace. Then I spoke to my friend Brian, our Youth Minister. He told me that he had been praying for Courtney last night after he saw our email.
He said:
"I just saw her sitting straight up and staring right at me. She was laughing. I was confused for a moment and told her that she didn't sit up on her own and she never looked at me in the eye. She laughed again and she said to me:
"You don't need to pray for me. I am OK. I am with God. I pray for you and so many others every day. Pray for my family, my mom and dad. They need your prayers now more than ever. I am OK."
Brian was very moved by this encounter. He told me that when the world looks at Courtney they see a broken young lady who is a burden to her family. They see her through the eyes of sin. They cannot see what God sees which is perfection and purity."
How's that for some answers?
Wait...there's more...
When I started reading my meditation for the day, my breath caught and my heart stopped for a moment. When you read it below, you will understand why. God is here in this moment of indecision and uncertainty. He is listening and He will not leave us. For that I am forever grateful. We will continue to pray and open our hearts and mind to listen to Him whisper in their silence. May God be praised now and forever, AMEN!
Mary
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Meditation: Exodus 14:21–15:1
The Lord was fighting for them. (Exodus 14:25)
God is totally involved in your life. When you come to him in prayer, he is right there, listening to you, inspiring you, and reminding you of his greatness. He is blessing you even when you are not asking. His gaze is fully set on you all the time.
And guess what? God wants all of you in return.
The God of Isaac and Jacob came to set his people free. The Israelites headed out of Egypt and found themselves trapped at the edge of the sea as the Egyptian soldiers pursued them. It may have seemed strange to Moses when God asked him to stretch out his hand over the sea. But when he did, God miraculously parted the sea so that they could cross to safety. This miracle didn’t happen because of a quick prayer that Moses made up in his mind. No, God told him to get his body involved as well, standing erect and raising his arms over the waters. Both body and spirit were involved in this miracle.
When God formed us, he created us spirit and body. And when he saved us, he saved us spirit and body as well. This means that God wants us to know freedom with him that includes all of us, not just our souls or spirits. This is why we have sacraments, in fact: We eat and drink. We immerse in water and anoint with oil. We give voice to our sinfulness, and we exchange rings and vows. All of these actions are sacred ways in which we can bring our whole selves to God, sacred ways in which we can meet God in our bodies as well as our souls.
As you come to God in prayer today, bring your whole self to him. Raise your hands in praise. Kneel in worship. Sing for joy. Maybe even lie prostrate in awe and adoration! Just as Miriam danced for joy at the people’s deliverance, go ahead and dance before the Lord. Remember: The more you bring to God, the more you will receive from him!
“Father, I give myself totally to you, my spirit and my body. Lord, part the waters before me, and lead me to freedom. Thank you for your unending love.”