Passionate Perseverance: life is a roller coaster...can't you hear me screaming?

"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."

I actually slept last night and I know that this was a direct answer to prayer so thanks to all of you who are storming those gates once more for us. I feel like my gratitude will never be enough but know that my prayers of thanksgiving for each of you are also rising. Courtney had a peaceful night as well. The first in quite some time, so thank you once more.

I was chatting with a friend yesterday and she she mentioned that my life is one hell of a roller coaster. She just wished I could sit and enjoy the view for a bit before disaster struck. I had to chuckle. Sitting is not something I do well and God knows that. I did however enjoy the analogy of what my life can look like at times and pondered that for quite some time. Yep, defiantly a roller coaster and at times one of those twisty freaky scary ones that turns you upside down.

You remember the first time you rode on a roller caoster don't you? The first one I ever went on was the Rebel Yell at Kings Dominion for my eighth grade field trip in 1981. I was so excited. They put the bar down and I held on tight with the clickity clack of the tracks taking me ever so slowly up that huge hill. The view was stunning. You could see the whole park then all of a sudden we were falling...down...down...down and I was screaming at the top of my lungs. It was no longer exciting but terrifying. I wanted off and NOW.

As I was whipped around corners, tilted over the twists and turns, I felt totally out of control. It's a horrifying feeling to know that there is nothing you can do to stop the ride. To get off halfway through would lead to certain disaster. Someone else has the power switch and they weren't throwing it any time soon. I had to suck it up and figure out a way to enjoy the insanity. I had no idea what a life skill that would become. As we came into the last little tunnel at the end of the ride, the cars slowed down and my stomach landed back at my feet. I got off slowly, my legs feeling like jello. My girlfriends looked at me and said "That was AWESOME! Let's go again!"

Amazingly enough...I said OK. I know crazy right? I have thought about that young girl a lot lately. The one I used to be, ready to rush straight into the fire not looking anywhere but ahead and all the unknowns I had yet to experience. I LOVED life and could not wait for the next roller coaster ride filled with all the undiscovered and twists and turns, always seeking adventure.

I miss that young girl and I have realized lately that God is calling me to be her once more. To seize the day no matter what comes. To look at each new twist and turn like a new opportunity to serve Him, to TRUST Him with everything I hold most precious to me. He is asking me to get back on that ride knowing that my adventurous spirit has been damaged and dinged over the years. He is asking me to lay down the things of this world that block my vision of Him and cling to the knowledge that He is the one who is directing this ride. He will NOT let me be flung from the tracks...not now, not ever!

When my head is dizzy from all the details and sleep does not come due to the worry, I call on Him to provide a steadying hand and a calming sea.

When I feel my world spin out of control and everything seems to be going wrong ALL at the same time, I call out to the one who looked down from the cross and said "I love you most of all."

When my foot steps are unsure and I feel my feet dangling in the air as the coaster of life flings me around one more twist, I know that this to shall pass. Nothing stays the same. God is sure and His word is the light unto my path.

When I lift my eyes and all I see are mountains and valleys filled with uncertainty I whisper the words He longs for me to say "Jesus, I trust in you."