a morning in which I dream of actually reaching a human being on the phone instead of a computer prompt...

:: noticing God's glory
It's been cloudy this morning. I am sitting in the kitchen, phone os speaker, waiting on hold with the insurance company, dreaming of actually talking to a human being instead of a computer. I like getting a real live person to chat with about what paperwork is needed for what doctors appointment or procedure for Miss Courtney. People are helpful (most of the time). Computer prompts make me want to jump from a tall building in a single bound. So incredibly frustrating.  

:: listening to
elevator music (on hold) and the washer and dryer(next to the kitchen)

:: clothing myself in
jeans, flats a t-shirt and sweater. I went with a pink and navy color story today. I needed something happy and springlike to wear. Pink reminds me of spring and everything fit so there's that. There is hope in spring.

:: thinking and thinking
about trusting totally in God's provision. It's the hardest thing for me to do, especially when it comes to medical/financial stuff. If you have been a longtime reader you know that about me. I tend to worry about, well, everything. Especially being able to provide what Miss Courtney needs. 

We are on our third week without the wheelchair lift. "Big Bertha" is working fine, so I take Courtney in the front seat and we go to therapy using her stroller. I lift her in and out. It's what we need to do for now. The lift repair is not going to be cheap. We are praying the motor is not burned out. I hope to take it into the lift repair place the first week of April. No way we can afford it before then. Heck, can't afford it then either, but it will give me time to have a little savings to at least have them look at it and give an estimate. 

Exciting times for sure. I spent almost an hour on the phone this morning just making several appointments for my Courtney and now I am in "please hold" hell. 


I actually had someone ask me why we do "all of this stuff" for Courtney. She isn't going to get better. Why waste the money? 

My answer is always the same "I am only doing for her what I would want someone to do for me. Just because she is disabled, does she deserve any less than I would do for my able bodied child? There is no waste when you are trying to care for a child in need. My job is to make this world the most accessible it can be for her and to make sure each day is filled with as much love and joy as we can muster. I don't know when God will call her home, and I don't want to regret anything. If we lose it all, then she is worth the loss. She is a beautiful, joy filled young lady. This is her life. It has value and purpose, just like yours and mine".

So I will work on the whole "Don't worry, be happy" thing. Prayers for me as I do? Thanks friends!

:: giving thanks for
#2043 ~ #2061
** my daughter and her fortitude and tenacity of spirit
** praise that my husband passed his PMP exam last week!! woot!! woot!!
** my son's willingness to be a servant fo his sister
** strong coffee and "real" cream
** being able to zip my skinny jeans without breathing in to make more room
** 64 ounces of water with lemon (taken daily)
** time in the sunshine with my daughter
** hearing Courtney laugh as her Daddy was reading a bedtime story
** being able to assist/encourage a friend who is caring for an injured family member
** homemade cream of mushroom soup
**  a working washer and dryer
** glasses that help me read and embroider
** the EMFIT monitor and peaceful sleep
** the EMFIT monitor alerting us to our girl in distress
** our parish Lenten Mission with the Franciscan Friars of the Primitive Rule
** time for prayer and fasting
** good friends and solid advice
** serving the youth of our parish
** my beautiful Courtney and handsome son Jonathan. Don't know who I would be without them.

::pondering prayerfully
+ for Elizabeth DeHority
+ for Shawn Kuykendall
+ for the soul of my sweet friend Karen who will be buried Friday. 
+ for my friend Sharon who will be eulogizing her
+ for my Courtney and her health
+ to be able to completely trust in God's plan for our family, both financial and medical. 
+ for the success of our parish Lenten Mission this week
+ for my husband - for wisdom and fortitude
+ for my Mama, to listen to where God is leading her
+ for my Jonathan and his upcoming classes
+ for all the souls in purgatory

:: creating by hand
I just finished a little embroidered piece and am looking forward to staring the paschal cloths this week. Right now I am looking at designs. Do you have any favorite religious designs for Easter? Let me know. I am always looking for something new to sew. 

:: in the kitchen
I am making homemade cream of mushroom soup today. One of my family's faves. Tomorrow it's vegetarian chili and Wednesday we are going the panini route. Simple is the name of the game this Lent. 

:: living the liturgy
This week we have our parish Lenten Mission and so far it has been awesome. So much richness about the faith revealed. Looking forward to the next four days. Life changing I think. 

:: keeping house
Spring cleaning a little bit at a time. Can't handle much more than that these days. Slow and steady wins the race. 

:: loving the moments
When I am able to spend a little time with my guy in the quite and just talk about life and what is going on in his world and in mine. That time to share without interruption is a pretty precious thing I must say. I treasure it. 

:: Miss Courtney's World
As I said last week we are in need of some new equipment for her due to her growth and the curvature of her spine I got a call in this morning to the new clinic which I hope we will be working with to make an evaluation appointment. I am trying not to have anxiety about how it's all going to turn out. 

Breathing in...breathing out...

She has done well these past few days. Only one major seizure a day and only two or three in her sleep over the last week. That is an improvement over last week. She has worked so very hard at PT and is making progress with helping me with transfers by pivoting and planting her feet for me. To think that two years ago, she was almost gone and couldn't even sit up anymore? Miraculous what God has done for Courtney and us. 

Look at her smile. The joy in this kid is just oozing out of every pour. Unless of course you are brushing her hair. Then she is shooting daggers out of her eyes. LOL! 

Happy Monday Y'all, 

Labels: ,