Chapter 11 ~ A Safe Place to Land...

We moved to Northern Virginia the summer of 1998. We rented a townhouse in Fairfax and began a new phase in our lives. Courtney went back to Hopkins for her check-ups with neurology. We found a pediatrician that wasn’t intimidated or overwhelmed by Courtney’s medical situation and would be willing to be the conduit for all her required specialists. She was six and Jonathan was nine.

One Friday morning, I took the children to daily Mass. There was a Catholic Church one mile from where we lived. As we found a place to sit, I noticed there was children’s choir. I hadn’t seen a school attached to the church, so I was a bit confused. After Mass, I approached a group of mothers who were standing by as their children were playing tag on the grass in front of the church.

I took a deep breath and introduced myself to my future prayer partners, Kathy M., Lynne R. and Cathy B. They warmly welcomed the children and me. They all home schooled.

Another answer to prayer...amazing...

My heart jumped for joy as I realized that we may have found a church home. They talked to me and answered my questions. Their kids included Jonathan in their game. They came up to Courtney and held her hand leaning in to introduce themselves. I could not have dreamt of a better welcome! To this day I don't think they have any idea how profound that day was for me.

I was so excited that I flew home on a cloud and was totally at peace with where we were. Courtney was doing well. Jonathan was excelling at school and his behavior was much improved. We lived close to my parents and even though Dad was struggling once again with his cancer fight, I was close enough to spend time with him.

Life was good.

Kathy M told me about their Family Group and invited us to join them. Family Group was not something I was familiar with. A group of families gathered after Mass on Sunday and the parents taught the kids their religious educational classes, including preparing them for the sacraments. They would move each week traveling from home to home sharing, praying and teaching.

This sounded so much better than traditional CCD classes that we had participated in before. So I discussed it with Jerry. He said it sounded like his bible study back home. He agreed to let me investigate whether we could be a part of it.

That Fall we joined Family Group. As we settled into our new routine homeschooling Jonathan, I continued to look for a school for Courtney. After one Sunday Mass we were chatting with our Pastor Fr. G, and he told us of a dear friend whose daughter was disabled like Courtney. She attended the Key Center in Springfield, VA, one of two center schools in Fairfax County.

I thanked him for the information and the next day looked up the school. It seemed like the perfect placement for Courtney. The Key Center addressed the educational needs of the severely disabled and those who could not physically handle being mainstreamed with their peers due to fragile health. There was a school nurse on staff to handle medications and emergencies involving the more medically involved children. Courtney needed the supervision because of her seizures.

I asked Jerry to accompany me on a tour of the school. We liked what we saw. There were children there from ages five to twenty-two. Their classrooms were bright and cheery and the staff was top notch. There was Physical, Occupational, Vision and Speech therapists on staff to work with her every day. Courtney was placed in Miss Kim’s class and she thrived under her care. A new IEP (Individual Education Plan) was put in place and we began to see our girl finally progress, taking very small developmental steps but steps forward nonetheless.

Will always love that smile... Jonathan 1999...

Jerry had also made a big decision. He begun taking RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation) classes to come into the church. He surprised me one Sunday when they had posted the information in the bulletin about the classes. He simply said "It's time." and the next month started attending.

I asked him at one point along the way, why he wanted to come into the church now after being married for almost 11 years. Being the historian he is, he answered quite simply "This institution has withstood 2000 years of abuse by the world around it and NOT changed it's base beliefs. That's saying something. I really can't put words to the rest. I just know it's what I am called to do." Jerry reminded me of my father quite often. No wasted words.

So at the Easter Vigil in 1999, with my entire extended family in attendance, Jerry came into the church. He chose the Confirmation name Thomas Aquinas. It had been my father's confirmation name. My Dad was beaming the entire night and I had a hard time trying not to cry. Later back at the house my father handed him a small, very old book.

"My mother gave this to me on my confirmation. It's Aquinas Summa Theologica. She signed it inside for me and now I have signed it to pass along to you."

Jerry was very quiet and just shook his head in thanks. It was a powerful, sweet moment watching the two men who held my heart share a moment. That book sits on my husbands bedside table to this day. And yes, he has read it once or twice.

He and my father shared something special, these two Navy men. I was all the happier for it.

We settled into a routine with the Family Group, homeschooling, Courtney's schooling and therapy. We also bought our first home, a little Cape Cod in Fairfax. It was the only one we could afford where Courtney's room and ours could be on the first floor. I needed to be close by so I could attend to her when she seized in the middle of the night.

Miss Courtney's seizures began to rear their ugly head once more though in the Fall of 1999. We were at the end of the road medically speaking. There were no more drugs to take, no more research to do. There was just surviving each one as they came. That was hard enough, believe me.